The Value of Special

Shopping is my comfort food. Spending money to treat myself or those I love says you’re special. Growing up, I envied friends who wore designer brands and enjoyed an abundance of the latest and greatest. I equated what I perceived as lack of the right stuff with a lack of love. A lack of worth. Somehow, I was less than because I had different or less, or because I didn’t have the same experiences.

To this day, I have a severe aversion to packing a lunch. My sad paper sack filled with whatever I could come up with never measured up to the beautifully wrapped sandwiches and cool pre-packaged foods, drinks, and love notes other moms daily delivered to their schoolchildren.

I brought this money-defines-me mindset into marriage and motherhood. Early on, when James and I determined to obey God with our finances – tithing and getting out of debt – we stopped spending and went without a lot of extras. I would look around at others who had more, especially the women who didn’t have to work and still had all they wanted, and I was jealous. In my mind, they were better than me. I was inadequate.

As the Lord has totally transformed our financial situation, He has shown me that spending excessively just because I can is just as wrong for me as spending what I don’t have in order to have whatever I want. In order to measure up or make something impressive.

Special occasions are the worst. One might expect extravagance at Christmas or on a birthday, but God used Valentine’s Day several years ago to expose how extreme I had become with spending to make something exceptional. Once again, based on what I remembered as lack of treats growing up, I was determined to make this celebratory occasion memorable for my children. The most obvious way to do that? Buy them gifts! When everyone decided they wanted to buy everyone else a gift, however, it spiraled into a  second Christmas. It was absolutely ridiculous, and I got one of “those looks” from my husband. You know the one. And he gently but firmly insisted, “I think that’s enough.”

And he was right.

This may sound cliché, but I’m learning that giving is so much more than a wrapped present. Love isn’t measured by belongings. Worth isn’t calculated by possessions.

While I still overdo Christmas and birthdays (God is working with me on that!), and I still really like to shop (He’s still working with me on that, too!), with God’s help, special occasions have become opportunities to love my family and friends through time, pampering and presentation versus possessions.

Family ways now trump family assets.

This weekend, our family had what I think is one of our best ever times together, not because we went somewhere exotic. It was a road trip for a few days in the Hill Country of Texas. Not because we engaged in any spectacular adventures. What was incredible about it was the fact that we were all together. And we all wanted to be together. Loved to be together. And we did something out of the ordinary for us. 

We wandered through the booths at a small town festival.

Hunting our own rocks, the guys constructed a fire pit. 

Gathering our own sticks, they built a fire, and we roasted hot dogs for dinner.

We made fools of ourselves utilizing the self-timer for a family photo in the bluebonnets.

We hiked. We relaxed. We talked. We laughed. We watched the sunset and feasted on s’mores under the stars.

It was a gift of time. Togetherness. Memories.

There might be a few amazing possessions my kids will always remember receiving, but what they talk about most are the times we have shared.

Not the presents under the tree, but gathering around the fireplace on Christmas Eve sharing the gift we’re putting in Jesus’ stocking, the part of ourselves we want to more fully surrender to Him for the coming year.

Or the eggs Benedict brunch served every Christmas morning (or afternoon as the kids get older and sleep a little later).

Not the heart candies on February 15, but the heart-shaped bacon, waffles, and eggs enjoyed as a family that morning.

Not the brand or design of their Easter outfits or volume of eggs unearthed in the yard, but the Good Friday dinner carefully crafted and arranged to tell the crucifixion story (thank you Jessica at www.showerofroses.blogspot.com for the idea!).

Not the gifts unwrapped on a birthday, but the people gathered for the occasion or the birthday morning breakfast feast or fancy home-cooked dinner.

I still want to make things special. It’s hard not to when my husband’s favorite closer when requesting something is, “but you have to make it special.”

It’s just that I no longer measure how special something is by brand, volume or expense. I’m learning to measure by a currency of caring, creatively making someone else feel important.

Makes me want to pack my kids a lunch the next time the opportunity presents itself.

I might even throw in a note.

Lord, thank you for the ways you lavish us with Your love. May the world know we are Yours by the way we love and care for our families and others. Please continually transform our mindsets as we become more wholly Yours.

Shauna Wallace

Holy His

Man, Woman, Baby: Why the Assault?

As I have tried to make sense of the baffling movement in America to oppress one particular group of people based on their beliefs in order to advance another based on their agenda, the Lord has shown me we have a word problem. Not of the math, rhetoric, or freedom of expression variety, but of the biblical kind.

It goes back to the very beginning, when “the earth was without form, and void; and darkness was on the face of the deep. And the Spirit of God was hovering over the face of the waters” (Genesis 1:2). When “the Word was with God, and the Word was God” (John 1:1).

When He created life…

And the Lord God formed man of the dust of the ground, and breathed into his nostrils the breath of life; and man became a living being (Genesis 2:7).

When He created marriage between a man and a woman…

And the Lord God said, “It is not good that man should be alone; I will make him a helper comparable to him”…And the Lord God caused a deep sleep to fall on Adam, and he slept; and He took one of his ribs, and closed up the flesh in its place. Then the rib which the Lord God had taken from man He made into a woman, and He brought her to man. And Adam said: “This is now bone of my bones and flesh of my flesh; she shall be called Woman, because she was taken out of Man.” Therefore a man shall leave his father and mother and be joined to his wife, and they shall become one flesh (Genesis 2:18-24).

When He blessed procreation and gave man dominion over the earth and every living thing in it…

Be fruitful and multiply; fill the earth and subdue it; have dominion over the fish of the sea, over the birds of the air, and over every living thing that moves on earth (Genesis 1:28).

And Satan immediately sought to destroy what God created by attacking His word. Whether he was the serpent or simply used the serpent, “more cunning than any beast of the field which the Lord God had made,” the devil tempted Eve by creating doubt about what God said.

Has God indeed said, “You shall not eat of every tree of the garden”? (Genesis 3:1).

And that’s all it took. Just a seed of doubt that the word of God is true. And that’s all it’s taking today. A seed of doubt that the word of God is true – to the word, to the letter – and our world, our culture, our nation, our churches, our families, are being altered. 

Just consider the targets: the very things God established at the very beginning of time. His order. His divine ways. His perfection. Can you see it? He created woman for man and joined them together as one. The attack? Redefine marriage to include same sex unions. He told them to fill the earth with children. The attack? Abortion. He gave man dominion over earth and its creatures. The attack? Every form of elevating the earth’s needs above man’s needs.

If the devil can destroy God’s perfect design for family and sustenance, he can interfere with a powerful platform from which God Almighty displays His supernatural power to save, provide, and protect. He mutes a mouthpiece of His love, goodness, and faithfulness. He distorts the message of the gospel and quiets a life that might otherwise be preaching.

The crazy thing to me is that it seems as if freedom of religion and expression are under assault only for those who adhere to the full counsel of the word of God. The degree to which groups and laws are able to silence God’s people is yet to be seen. But really, they never truly can. We may lose certain freedoms. We may suffer consequences. But no one can take what we hide in our hearts. No one can take our voice. No one can silence God’s mighty works in and through us. No one can contain God or halt His plans.

Look at what happened in Acts 8:1-4. After Saul consented to Stephen’s death, “a great persecution arose against the church which was at Jerusalem; and they were all scattered throughout the regions of Judea and Samaria…As for Saul, he made havoc of the church, entering every house, and dragging off men and women, committing them to prison. Therefore, those who were scattered went everywhere preaching the word.” 

Man's efforts to stop the gospel simply fueled its spread. Intolerance simply furthered the very message it sought to squelch. 

We, His people, must not allow fear to shut the mouth He desires to use. He will still accomplish His end. Satan loses. Every knee will still bow and every tongue confess that Jesus Christ is Lord. It’s a foregone conclusion. In the meantime, how are we making ourselves available to Him?

Lord, may Your Holy Spirit teach us in every hour what we should say (Luke 12:12). Give us utterance that we would boldly make known the mystery of the gospel (Ephesians 6:19), and let us love one another that others will know we are disciples of Jesus Christ (John 13:35) as we become more wholly Yours.

Shauna Wallace

Holy His

A Heavenly End to Addiction (At the Mercy of the Mirror Part 4)

With any addiction, stronghold, or habitual sin, something other than Jesus takes top priority. Consumes you. Defines you. Establishes your worth. Determines your sense of happiness and well-being. Rules your emotions. And everything is affected. The way you see yourself. The decisions you make about how others perceive and feel about you. Your marriage. Family. Your children, and how they see themselves. How they define themselves. How they cope with the world around them. Your sense or need for control. Your job, friendships, and other commitments.

Fear drives you. Fear of what will happen if you stop or if you don’t. Fear of what will happen if people figure it out. Fear of being exposed. Fear of what you’ll lose. Fear of not having control. Essentially, fear of man – which snares or lures us away from God’s best for us – trumps trusting God, where we are safe (Proverbs 29:25) and satisfied from above.

And here we arrive at the most recent defining moment in my battle with bulimia as I explain in this excerpt from my book, Holy His: Hope for a Life and a Nation Wholly His:

As I studied the fear of the Lord, He gave me a powerful revelation through Proverbs 19:23: “The fear of the Lord leads to life, and he who has it will abide in satisfaction; he will not be visited with evil.”

Each one of us is driven by the need to be satisfied. It is the very core of what we seek in life, and the Lord showed me that this central need for satisfaction that can only be met by the Lord Jesus Christ is what drives one to addiction. Either we will fear the Lord and find contentment in Jesus, or we will seek pleasure and fulfillment from the things of this world and remain empty, disappointed, and disgruntled.

The longer we continue to turn to anything or anyone but Jesus for the satisfaction only He can bring, the more likely we are to fall into the bondage of addiction. If we are walking in the ways of the Lord, fearing Him, and obeying Him, we will abide in His perfect satisfaction.

Proverbs 27:7 explains, “A satisfied soul loathes the honeycomb, but to a hungry soul every bitter thing is sweet.” When the satisfaction of our soul is met through Jesus, we will be repulsed by even the best this world has to offer. We will not be driven to seek satisfaction from anyone or anything else, and we will not be visited with evil.

But if our soul is empty, anything the world offers, including that which brings destruction and death, will appear attractive. If we are Christians, and we are not abiding in satisfaction from above, we need to look at ourselves and see if we have lost the fear of the Lord and are looking to the world for fulfillment.

It’s more than just stopping or getting rid of sin in our lives. Yes, we must “put off, concerning your former conduct, the old man which grows corrupt according to the deceitful lusts” (Ephesians 4:22). But we must also “be renewed in the spirit of your mind” (verse 23) and “put on the new man which was created according to God, in true righteousness and holiness” (verse 24).

The Greek meaning conveys a picture of one sinking into freshly made, brand new, unworn clothes. Disrobed of the old rags, in the fear of the Lord, we must clothe our minds and therefore our actions in new digs made of righteousness and holiness. 

If we don’t “put on the new man,” we are in danger of what Jesus describes in Matthew 12:43-45:

When an unclean spirit goes out of a man, he goes through dry places, seeking rest, and finds none. Then he says, “I will return to my house from which I came.” And when he comes, he finds it empty, swept, and put in order. Then he goes and takes with him seven other spirits more wicked than himself, and they enter and dwell there; and the last state of that man is worse than the first.

In referencing this passage, I am not taking a theological stand on demon possession, and most especially of Christians. I’ll leave that for those much more scholarly than I. I am simple saying a life swept clean but left empty of Jesus is prime real estate for a devil’s playground.

To be satisfied from heaven is to fill the house with Jesus – Him as Lord, His word as the truth by which we live, breath, and have our being. Satisfied to the point where nothing else holds any attraction, not even the honeycomb, or the best this world has to offer.

Today, I am free. Really, really free. God’s word has proven true: Jesus is the way, the truth, and the life, and the truth has set me free.

“So if the Son makes you free, you shall be free indeed” (John 8:36).

Need freedom? Seek Jesus. Put your faith in Him and Him alone. Nothing else will do.

Lord, open blind eyes. Soften hardened hearts. Give us wisdom and understanding. Teach us to fear You, and satisfy us from heaven as we become more wholly Yours today.

Shauna Wallace

Holy His

Crumpled Grave Clothes Litter My Heart

Resurrection Sunday. It is early. I am still. Lord, what do I say? We celebrate Easter with bunnies, baskets, hidden eggs, and squeals of delight, while an empty tomb beckons. One day a dead body. The next, only burial clothes. One day a fortified cell. Defeat. The next, a symbol of hope. One day the finality of man’s worst punishment. The next, the finality of God’s eternal deliverance.

What is here for me at the mouth of the empty tomb? The resurrected life. Alive in Christ, having died in Him. God shows me: Selfishness cannot live in the face of sacrifice. The dying to self of the crucified life is absolutely necessary for the glory of a resurrected life.

What may appear to be a checklist of good works (see “Crucified Like Him”) is but the natural result of a crucified self. But there is nothing natural about it. Not when God sums up the condition of man’s heart as “deceitful above all things, and desperately wicked” (Job 17:9). We can honestly say we were born that way. For that, Jesus died. Brutally. Innocently. Without sin. For what we deserve. To pay the eternal penalty we owe for our sin. The penalty owed by every one of us. No exceptions.

Jesus’ shed blood is the only verdict that will stand in the heavenly court of law when we stand before a holy God. To put our faith in Jesus as the only source of our salvation, to be saved by grace through faith and nothing else, is to die to self and be raised in new life in Christ. Just like He was. Resurrected from death to eternal life. Yes, eternal life in heaven when we are saved. Guaranteed. Because of one man’s sacrifice. The Son of God.

How do we not see? How do we not fall on our faces in joy and sorrow? How do we not rejoice? How do we not receive the free gift He offers? How do we not respond with the one simple requirement: faith. In Him, and Him alone. How do we not love Him because of His great love for us?

The empty tomb awaits. “Therefore, if anyone is in Christ, he is a new creation; old things have passed away; behold, all things have become new” (2 Corinthians 5:17). Where once our tomb was a place of hopelessness, uncertainty, death, and bondage, in Christ, it is now empty of those things and filled with the Spirit of the living God.

Do you see it? When we place our faith in the resurrected Christ, all things are made new. Where there was once sin and destruction, there is now an empty tomb. A place of hope. We are raised to new life in Christ.

Where alcoholism once sealed us in our tomb, it is now empty. Where sexual immorality once sealed us in our tomb, it is now empty. Only grave clothes. Our old self is no longer there. Where anger and strife once sealed us in our tomb, it is now empty. Where ambition once sealed us in our tomb, it is now empty. Jealousy, envy, and discontentment? Only grave clothes. Eating disorder? Only grave clothes. Hurt, brokenness, unforgiveness, sexual abuse, verbal abuse, physical abuse, broken marriage, broken home, drugs, stealing, murder, homosexuality, hatred, judgment, gossip, unkindness, selfishness, self-seeking, pornography, impure thoughts, vulgar language, coarse jesting? Yes, grave clothes!

In the emptiness of the tomb we find the sobering uselessness of all our pursuits for a substitute. The uselessness of the counterfeits Satan offers to distract us from true salvation. True deliverance. True joy. True security. We find that Jesus is “the way, the truth, and the life” (John 14:6). And as He continues in that verse, “No man comes to the Father but through me.”

Will you come to Jesus? To find forgiveness, peace and hope. To find the crumpled up burial clothes of a life once eternally condemned. To find an empty tomb because you’ve been raised up in Christ to a new life where all things are made new.

Are there sins you need to confess? Bondage from which you need to be set free? When you go to the empty tomb, do you find yourself wearing your burial clothes again? Jesus died for it all. He secured victory, once and for all. The sins we’ve committed, are committing, and will commit. It is all on Him. It is only on us to come. And to return.

Romans 8:1 assures us, “There is therefore now no condemnation to those who are in Christ Jesus, who do not walk according to the flesh, but according to the Spirit.” We must take responsibility, but condemnation is not ours. Not in Christ.

Stand at the mouth of Jesus’ empty tomb and rejoice. Death is defeated. Eternal life a guarantee for those who put their trust in Jesus.

Lord, may we find grave clothes crumpled in the tombs of our hearts every day as we become more wholly Yours.

Happy Easter!

Shauna Wallace

Holy His

Crucified Like Him

Good Friday. I try to imagine Jesus. What He bore. The pain. The humiliation. The suffering. Are those words even adequate? Is it even possible to grasp the magnitude of what He willingly, in love for us and obedience to His Father, submitted to in order to pay the penalty for our sin? So that we may be saved. So that we might live a crucified life.

Comprehension eludes me. The smallest glimmer of understanding crushes me. At this very time, several thousand years ago, He willingly submitted to the worst man could inflict in order to make God’s best available to you and me through His death, burial, and resurrection.

He didn’t want the flogging. The spit in His face. The hateful taunting and humiliation. The nails driven cruelly in His hands and feet. The suffocation. The loneliness. The rejection of His own Father. He knew what was coming. Cried to His Father, "Father, if it is Your will, take this cup away from Me; nevertheless not My will, but Yours, be done" (Luke 22:42). He longed to be spared the cup of crucifixion to the point of sweating blood. “Then an angel appeared to Him from heaven, strengthening Him. And being in agony, He prayed more earnestly. Then His sweat became like great drops of blood falling down to the ground” (Luke 22:43-44).

But His death was necessary.

Our death is necessary, too.

Death to self.

The crucified life.

Not my will, but His.

Obedience.

“Though He (Jesus) was a Son, yet He learned obedience by the things which He suffered. And having been perfected, He became the author of eternal salvation to all who obey Him” (Hebrews 5:8-9).

We, too, learn obedience by the things we suffer. Paul said it like this: “I have been crucified with Christ; it is no longer I who live, but Christ lives in me; and the life which I now live in the flesh I live by faith in the Son of God, who loved me and gave Himself for me” (Galatians 2:20).

What can I say today, Good Friday, that would hold any significance in light of Jesus’ sacrifice? Nothing. My words are totally inadequate. But His aren’t. The word – the lamp unto our feet and light unto our path – illuminates the way to the crucified life.

Let this mind be in you which was also in Christ Jesus, who, being in the form of God, did not consider it robbery to be equal with God, but made Himself of no reputation, taking the form of a bondservant, and coming in the likeness of men. And being found in appearance as a man, He humbled Himself and became obedient to the point of death, even the death of the cross (Philippians 2:5-8).

Let nothing be done through selfish ambition or conceit, but in lowliness of mind let each esteem others better than himself. Let each of you look out not only for his own interests, but also for the interests of others (Philippians 2:3-4).

Walk in love, as Christ also has loved us and given Himself for us, an offering and a sacrifice to God for a sweet-smelling aroma (Ephesians 5:2).

…present your bodies a living sacrifice, holy, acceptable to God, which is your reasonable service (Romans 12:1).

…by the Spirit you put to death the deeds of the body, you will live (Romans 8:12).

...lay down our lives for the brethren (I John 3:16).

...wives, submit to our husbands as is fitting in the Lord (Colossians 3:18).

…husbands, love your wives, just as Christ also loved the church and gave Himself for her (Ephesians 5:25).

…children, obey your parents in all things, for this is well pleasing to the Lord (Colossians 3:20).

…Fornication and all uncleanness or covetousness, let it not even be named among you, as is fitting for saints; neither filthiness, nor foolish talking, nor coarse jesting, which are not fitting, but rather giving of thanks (Ephesians 5:3-4).

…put away all bitterness, wrath, anger, clamor, evil speaking, and malice (Ephesians 4:31).

…owe no one anything except to love one another (Romans 13:8).

…do good and share (Hebrews 13:16).

…give as you purpose in your heart, not grudgingly or of necessity; for God loves a cheerful giver (2 Corinthians 9:7).

…judge not, condemn not (Luke 6:37).

…be kind to one another, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, even as God in Christ forgave you (Ephesians 4:32). (Even when you’re not asked.)

…be subject to rulers and authorities, obey, and be ready for every good work (Titus 3:1)

…speak evil of no one, be peaceable, gentle, showing all humility to all men (Titus 3:2).

…continually offer the sacrifice of praise to God, that is, the fruit of our lips, giving thanks to His name (Hebrews 13:15).

…rejoice always, pray without ceasing, in everything give thanks (I Thessalonians 5:16-18).

Mission impossible? Yes! For me. In my own effort or power. But with God, nothing will be impossible (Luke 1:37). We can do everything through Him who gives us strength (Philippians 4:13), because His grace is sufficient for us, and His power is made perfect in weakness (2 Corinthians 12:9).

Why the crucified life?

We have this treasure in earthen vessels, that the excellence of the power may be of God and not of us. We are hard-pressed on every side, yet not crushed; we are perplexed, but not in despair; persecuted, but not forsaken; struck down, but not destroyed – always carrying about in the body the dying of the Lord Jesus, that the life of Jesus also may be manifested in our body. For we who live are always delivered to death for Jesus' sake, that the life of Jesus also may be manifested in our mortal flesh. So then death is working in us, but life in you. And since we have the same spirit of faith, according to what is written, "I believed and therefore I spoke," we also believe and therefore speak, knowing that He who raised up the Lord Jesus will also raise us up with Jesus, and will present us with you. For all things are for your sakes, that grace, having spread through the many, may cause thanksgiving to abound to the glory of God. Therefore we do not lose heart. Even though our outward man is perishing, yet the inward man is being renewed day by day. For our light affliction, which is but for a moment, is working for us a far more exceeding and eternal weight of glory, while we do not look at the things which are seen, but at the things which are not seen. For the things which are seen are temporary, but the things which are not seen are eternal (2 Corinthians 4:7-5:5, emphasis mine).

“Therefore we also, since we are surrounded by so great a cloud of witnesses, let us lay aside every weight, and the sin which so easily ensnares us, and let us run with endurance the race that is set before us, looking unto Jesus, the author and finisher of our faith, who for the joy that was set before Him endured the cross, despising the shame, and has sat down at the right hand of the throne of God. For consider Him who endured such hostility from sinners against Himself, lest you become weary and discouraged in your souls. You have not yet resisted to bloodshed, striving against sin” (Hebrews 12:1-4).

Lord, help us live a crucified life today and this Easter season as we become more wholly Yours.

Shauna Wallace

Holy His

Idols and Contaminants (At the Mercy of the Mirror Part 3)

Lies exposed, the Lord continued to peel me like an onion, revealing deeper needs for His grace in my life and battle with bulimia. I don’t remember what was going on at the time of my third defining moment. I don’t know if I heard someone speak or read a book or if God spoke directly to my heart again. But somehow, God showed me that the very core of my disorder was idolatry.

I had “…exchanged the truth of God for the lie, and worshipped and served the creature rather than the Creator, who is blessed forever” (Romans 1:25). My body, how I felt about myself in it, and how I desired others to admire and accept me because of it, had become my god.

I didn’t have a skin problem. I had a sin problem. I could not worship both my body and Jesus, and I knew He was my only hope to ever be fully healed and totally free.

So when a tailspin threatened, I began to declare OUT LOUD: “My body is not my god, You are, Lord, and I will praise and worship You.” I spoke this truth for all to hear. Sometimes minute by minute, other times day by day. Then weeks would pass without incident. Months. And now years.

“Faith comes by hearing, and hearing by the word of God” (Romans 10:17), so when we speak God’s truth out loud, we are building our faith – “the confidence that what we hope for will actually happen; it gives us assurance about things we cannot see” (Hebrews 11:1, NLT).

Even Jesus didn’t just think about how the devil was defeated; He spoke defeat directly to him: “Away with you, Satan! For it is written, ‘You shall worship the Lord your God, and Him only you shall serve’” (Matthew 4:10).

No idols.

And no contaminants.

As the Lord deepened my understanding of His word, He convicted me of a greater responsibility to purify my thoughts and actions, as 2 Corinthians 7:1 sets forth: “Since we have these promises, dear friends, let us purify ourselves from everything that contaminates body and spirit, perfecting holiness out of reverence for God” (NIV). 

This was my fourth defining moment. As I share in my book, Holy His: Hope for a Life and a Nation Wholly His:

Previously, I thought only the Lord alone could purify me, but this verse makes it clear that I have a part in purifying myself through the choices I make. The word contaminate stood out and really convicted me. To contaminate is to defile, pollute, or stain something. We are not to allow anything into our thoughts, bodies, or spirits that would defile, pollute, stain, or make them filthy before the Lord. That is our part in cleansing or purifying ourselves.

When there is anything I know to be a trigger, I cannot allow it to contaminate my body and spirit. If straying from habits that keep me close to the Lord, stress, other sin in my life, certain foods, certain circumstances, or certain activities cause me to stumble back into this battle, it is my responsibility to purify myself of those things. As the Holy Spirit reveals and convicts us of the things that contaminate us, we become holy as God is holy when we purify ourselves of those things – when we deliberately choose to no longer allow them in our lives – out of reverence for God. The word reverence in this verse refers to the fear of God. The original Greek meaning of this use of fear is terror or dread. God is a holy God. He cannot tolerate sin. We will be motivated to perfect holiness in our lives when we are terrified of God’s holy wrath. If we don’t fear Him, what motive do we have?

It’s like the Israelites when they crossed the Jordan to take possession of the Promised Land: Their victory depended on their obedience and purity, a lesson they learned the hard way after their first victory Jericho. They were to destroy everyone and everything, except for the gold, silver, bronze, and iron, which were to be consecrated to the Lord. Specifically, Joshua warned the Israelites against taking the accursed things, or the things devoted to destruction.

When they attacked their second target, Ai, a smaller city spies determined would only require two to three thousand warriors to overtake, thirty-six men were struck down as the people of Ai chased the mighty Israelites away.

“The hearts of the people melted and became like water” (Joshua 7:5), and Joshua fell on his face before the Lord, baffled and broken. Turns out, Achan was hiding stolen goods from Jericho, and the Lord declared to Joshua: “You cannot stand before your enemies until you take away the accursed thing from among you” (Joshua 7:13).

The same is true for us. With accursed things in our lives, we have no hope for victory. They were unable to take possession of any more land until they got rid of the banned items. In order to take possession of God’s promises to us, we must purify ourselves from everything that contaminates body and spirit.

No idols.

No contaminants.

Lord, help us to love You and You alone with all our heart, mind, strength, and soul, putting no idols before You and purifying ourselves as we become more wholly Yours.

Part 1

Part 2

Shauna Wallace

Holy His

Disabled by Deceit (At the Mercy of the Mirror Part 2)

More than a decade passed between finding myself wrapped in the shower liner, facing the likely end of my battle with bulimia, and my next defining moment. During that time, I was forced to confront other sins that had spiraled out of control. I spent time in therapy and twelve-step programs in an attempt to set myself free. Things got better some of the time, but true freedom, healing, love, and worth eluded me.

As the Lord turned my heart to Jesus as my only source and healer, I learned what it meant to have a personal relationship with a tangibly real Savior who loved me unconditionally, to love Him back through reading and obeying scripture. Yet, the way I saw myself based on how I felt about my body ruled my relationship with James and affected how I treated my children. I was confronted daily with the detrimental effects of my continuing struggle.

One day, out on a compulsive six-mile run to burn off steam and calories, the Lord spoke to my heart: “When you die, do you think your children are going to stand at your funeral and say how thankful they are that their mother was a size four all their lives?” My heart  broke for them, because that’s what ruled me: staying little. It took priority. And it was destroying the very people I loved the most.

For a second time, I was forced to confront what lay at the end of my path: death. No longer physical death, but spiritual death. Relational death. Death to what my husband and children deserved from me. Needed from me. And the harmful consequences to them if they didn’t get it.

The Lord opened my eyes of understanding to see I was ready to be free, whatever it took. My answer to the Lord that day was this: “Lord, if I have to be a size twelve in order to be truly free, in order to have joy, then let it be.” Not that there’s anything wrong with a size twelve, but for someone who is terrified that life will literally fall apart with the addition of a single pound, to add even one size was unthinkable.

In that place of total surrender and readiness, the Lord began to expose the root of my stronghold: lies.

 “And you shall know the truth,

and the truth shall make you free” (John 8:32).

I don’t remember anything remarkable about this particular day or what was happening in my life, but I was standing in front of the mirror, sinking emotionally and spiritually because I saw myself as fat, and the Lord spoke to my heart once again: “Shauna, it’s impossible to be a size four and be fat.”

It was a simple truth with tremendous power to transform my thinking. God’s truth – His word – sanctifies us (John 17:17), purifying us and renewing our souls. I am not declaring God’s words to me that day as scripture. I am simply saying God revealed truth to me that day, and that truth changed things deep inside me as only God’s truth can do.

On the flip side, in order to divert us from the power of the gospel, “the power of God to salvation for everyone who believes” (Romans 1:16), Satan lures us onto his path of death and destruction with falsities. He “was a murderer from the beginning, and does not stand in the truth, because there is no truth in him. When he speaks a lie, he speaks from his own resources, for he is a liar and the father of it” (John 8:44).

The devil’s MO has not changed from the beginning of time, when Eve declared: “The serpent deceived me, and I ate” (Genesis 3:13).

If he can deceive us, he can disable us.

I believed the lie the devil whispered to me constantly, telling me how fat and unlovable I was. But as Jesus promised in John 16:13, the Holy Spirit, the Spirit of truth, “will guide you into all truth.” The truth God exposed set me free from my self-destructive thinking and enabled me to retrain my thoughts according to His truth.

It took some time, but when I felt myself leaning toward the lies again, when my reflection in the mirror threatened to send me into a tailspin, I would repeat the truth: It is impossible to be a size four and be fat. I would declare Psalm 139:14: “I will praise You, for I am fearfully and wonderfully made; marvelous are Your works, and that my soul knows very well.”

Beth Moore, in her Bible study, Breaking Free, talks about rewriting what’s on the wall of our minds. In identifying the lies we’ve been told throughout the years, we can then replace them with God’s truth, which is the only truth. As we believe God’s word, as we live by it, He sets us free.

Alternatively, deceived hearts turn us aside from God (Isaiah 44:20) to “serve other gods and worship them (Deuteronomy 11:16). The result of exchanging the truth of God for a lie is idolatry, the root exposed in my third defining moment.

Will you join me again Thursday?

Lord, sanctify us with Your truth today, setting our feet firmly on the path that leads to life as we become more wholly Yours.

Part 1

Part 3

Shauna Wallace

Holy His